Is it just me, or has Microsoft Excel progressed to a point where it is literally worse than genocide? I remember Lotus 123, SuperCalc, Works 2.0 for DOS. I remember KvikCalc and even the poor spreadsheet-knockoff I coded in GW-BASIC at age 12 with all the programming knowledge of – well – a 12-years old. They all were spreadsheets.
They were not great, but they were working. Granted, they were working like a public servant (i.e., slowly and barely), but they ran on my Commodore PC 10 II, which sported 640 kb of memory and 20 Mb of hard disk. Now, with a computer with literally over 10000 times as much memory and hard disk, Excel is not even able to accept input. It’s an exercise in frustration whose magnitude only parred with my awesomeness and humility.
Less than one millionth of what is unable to run Excel was able to land the moonlander safely i̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶d̶e̶s̶e̶r̶t̶ ̶n̶e̶a̶r̶ ̶R̶o̶s̶w̶e̶l̶l̶ on the Moon. Heck, even Emacs can run on this computer (but why would I – I have vi). My theory is that Greece’s economy is running splendidly, but the EU is using Excel to get the numbers and what really crashed was Windows 95 running Excel and not the economy of one of the most hard-working and honest countries in Europe.
Here’s a picture of Hitler championing Excel in Spanish. I’m pretty sure that’s entirely historically correct. If that doesn’t tell you all you need to know of this Endlösung of a program, I don’t know what is wrong with you.
