Hey NASA, call me if you want a fool-proof design for a space elevator!

It’s quite simple really. Surround Donald Trump by a handful Mexicans and have them insult his hands or other throwaway John Oliver-funny insults. Each will be followed by “the wall just got 10 feet higher.”

When the wall reaches the moon, which interestingly will happen quite precisely just as King Trump’s first term runs out if we assume a sustained rate of one insult per second (1 ips), just wait till the first sneaky Mexican scales the wall, and tie a box or a shopping cart or something to the line they used to climb the wall. Voila, a perfectly good space elevator.

And we got Mexico to pay for it, so it’s free too!