Why I Shouldn’t be Allowed Internet Access

I just put in a bid for an aircraft carrier.  It’s been a dream for long shared among Jonas and I to be the owners of an aircraft carrier.  We even applied for a loan to get one (with the great argument that once we got the ship, we didn’t have to pay back the loan, as we’d be owning an aircraft carrier), but for some reason, the bank didn’t call us back.

Then, a day or two ago, this popped op!  It is the perfect opportunity, and naturally we acted, and I sent this bid:

To whom it may concern,

I would like put in a bit for the HMS Invincible.  The bid is for the entire ship on a debt-free basis.  I am bidding £15, to be paid in cash or gold, for the ship as it is now, but I am willing to increase the bid to £30 in case it comes with planes and helicopters enough to take over a small country.  If you replace the non-engines with actual engines or, say, a small Indian willing to row a lot, I am willing to throw in an extra fiver.

Please let me know how you wish to proceed with this deal.  I am looking forward to doing business with you!

I really hope we get it. But then again, why wouldn’t we?

3 thoughts on “Why I Shouldn’t be Allowed Internet Access

  1. Actually the bank did call back but they did not take our request seriously; they thought we were just testing whether their system worked. We were applying for a five billion dollars loan.

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