The Burning Cottage: An Approach to Solving the Mash/Meat-Equilibrium

TL;DR: I made cottage pie and put bacon on top. Then I wrote a long-winded description of it.

This solves the so-called mash/meat-equilibrium, which is a variant of the Nash equilibrium, just more delicious. The mash/meat-equilibrium states that

The mash should at all times by covered by meat on all sides in order to achieve a global optimum of the deliciousness.
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